I asked roughly 20 men and 20 women (single and in relationships) two questions: When was the last time you gave/received a BJ and then followed up with why/why not? What I came to find out was, the majority of people in relationships aint getting/receiving BJs at all! Listen, I am the first to admit that I had fallen into a sex routine when I was in a long-term relationship. Especially when we lived together, and it wasn’t intentional at all. Sometimes you’re just tired, man. And sometimes you’re just so busy you don’t really stop to think about when the last time you switched it up. I get it. However, when I realized that I hadn’t gone downtown in over a month, I started to feel like a shitty girlfriend. Anyone can pull down their pants and do the Horizontal Dance. A BJ…. Now a BJ is a skilled art form.
Some of the men that I polled, I just felt downright bad for. Ladies, if you think your man doesn’t want a BJ or just doesn’t care about not getting one, he’s lying. It’s like us saying we hate flowers. We’ll always take flowers. Some guys even said, “HA! Good luck! I’m lucky if I even get laid, let alone a BJ!” And most women that I polled simply just said they don’t like doing it or that it’s “gross”. There are many things I don’t like. I don’t like paying rent. But, I do it because living on my own makes me happy. Sometimes you need to just bite the bullet and do it because it makes the other person happy. And if there’s anything I’ve learned about love in the past couple years is that I get more joy out of making the other person happy than I do myself. Besides, it’s like an unwritten rule – if you go Downtown, then so will he!
Moral of the story is – people need to stop thinking about themselves so much in relationships. Think about the other person’s needs, even if it is above yours. You can’t have it all – you need to give a little to get a little.